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staffordvw

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Best clip ever [Oct. 8th, 2008|11:13 pm]
staffordvw
The Bluths visit Buster at the hospital and get some confusing news.
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I'll really be OFF. [Dec. 20th, 2007|03:21 pm]
staffordvw
[Tags|, , ]

Melson DGD    so what are you guys doing next week?  do you have the week off?
Kevin dgd    starting tomorrow, I'm off until the 7th
Kevin dgd    SO off.
Melson DGD    wow
Melson DGD    you suck.  =P
Kevin dgd    like so totally off that work will actually be UNDONE while I'm away
Melson DGD    LOL
Melson DGD    that's the holy grail of vacation
Melson DGD    i'm taking the whole month of october off next year
Kevin dgd    Stars will spin off into the void as the universe recoils from the echoing shockwave of my disassociation.
Melson DGD    lol
Kevin dgd    and I may eat some PIE.
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Is this the beginning of another Kevin's Law? [Oct. 19th, 2007|05:45 pm]
staffordvw
It has been shown by empirical evidence that the closer you get to Massachusetts, the more frequently Dunkin' Donuts locations appear. This relationship has roughly an inverse-exponential relationship to the distance one is from a theoretical point of critical saturation. Extension of the theory postulates that there exists a hypothetical point in the state where an infinite number of Dunkin' Donuts locations exist. Donutologists often refer to the Massachusetts state border as an event horizon of sorts where there is no chance of escaping without experiencing catastrophic deliciousness.
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Kevin's Second Law [Sep. 27th, 2007|03:28 pm]
staffordvw
[Tags|]
[mood |Inspired]

Kevin's Second Law: There exists no robot that cannot be improved in form or function by the addition of a flamethrower.

For posterity I will also formalize Kevin's First Law which was defined many years ago.

Kevin's First Law: For any number of wires, strings or similar objects, the probability of complex entanglement between them increases exponentially with the inverse of distance. Time required to entangle is also affected in a similar fashion. This phenomenon can be observed in consequence, but not in action.
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I found this IM archive... [Sep. 26th, 2007|03:43 pm]
staffordvw
[Tags|]
[mood |amusedamused]

Kevin dgd: Box text for the future DGD release of LettucePRO:

Follow the path of one of the world's most exciting vegetables, the lettuce, from seed to salad dish!

Till your soil into perfect rows and plant the seeds of FUN as you fertilize and weed your way to glory!

Employ over 12 types of farming equipment ranging from the lowly hand spade to the massive and disorderly IMMIGRANT WORKFORCE!

Get your hands dirty with our patent-pending SOILSIM technology that renders vast acres of soil, to a scale depth of 400 feet, as
individual particles with realistic viscosity, friction and brown!

Play online in hectic Head-2-Head mode: sort varieties of lettuce into Ultrabins before your opponent.

Play for speed, accuracy or go the distance in the Time Trial!

LettucePRO delivers unparalleled realism where other lettuce related simulations fail.

Join the harvest today!

gillian@work: an expansion where you can alter the genes of your lettuce to provide more shelf stability and a more uniform presentation

Kevin dgd: ooh the xpac could be sponsored by Monsanto

gillian@work: yah!

Kevin dgd:  * from the makers of RadishBEET: The Veggie Rhythm Game
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A snippet of conversation [Jun. 27th, 2007|01:31 pm]
staffordvw
Melson DGD he said he left some roach traps under the counter just to be safe
Melson DGD but aside from looking through my couch (for loose change, i think), that was about all they did
Kevin dgd ha
Kevin dgd did he tie tiny snares under the counter?
Melson DGD little boxes held up by little Y-shaped sticks with string tied to a piece of cheese.
Kevin dgd tiny bear traps arranged in a six-pack configuration
Melson DGD haha
Melson DGD he drilled tiny holes i in the counter tops, put a nail in the bottom, and covered them with tea leaves.
Kevin dgd tiny claymore mines: "This side toward roaches"
Melson DGD piles of matches placed up high, with a tripwire down below, a la the Ewoks.
Kevin dgd or the toothpicks-on-pendulum smashers
Melson DGD he put a piece of paper towel roll with one end blocked off. when the roach goes in, he triggers a marble rolling in from the other side, crushing him
Melson DGD he actually just put some matchbox cars down there, along with a bunch of beer, hoping they'll get drunk and try to drive home, killing themselves and any other nearby roaches.
Kevin dgd a little diorama of a reading room with a fireplace inside a victorian home with a tiny plush chair and brandy snifter. One then places a spider wearing a velour smoking jacket and a monocle into the chair with the world's smallest volume of E.A. Poe
Kevin dgd I guarantee no roaches in 2 days
Melson DGD lol
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(no subject) [Jun. 30th, 2006|11:43 am]
staffordvw

I escaped from the Dungeon of Staffordvw!

I killed Smacktor the owlbear.

I looted the Amulet of Monocle Collecting, the Dagger of Monocle Collecting, the Axe of Tastybrains, the Armour of Monocle Collecting, the Wand of Toastcraft, the Armour of Toastcraft, the Armour of Toastcraft, the Sword of Toastcraft, the Dagger of Toastcraft and 28 gold pieces.

Score: 53

Explore the Dungeon of Staffordvw and try to beat this score,
or enter your username to generate and explore your own dungeon...
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(no subject) [Jun. 30th, 2006|11:25 am]
staffordvw

I died in the Dungeon of Dabion

I was killed in a crystalline catacomb by Nerezza the mind flayer, whilst carrying...

the Shield of Bronzite, the Dagger of Imotic, the Sword of Novas007, the Amulet of Sarron, the Amulet of Runexe and 68 gold pieces.

Score: 59

Explore the Dungeon of Dabion and try to beat this score,
or enter your username to generate and explore your own dungeon...
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TEH SMRAT! [Jan. 9th, 2006|08:19 pm]
staffordvw
9/9 Genius
You are 82% knowledgable and 92% intellectual.
Amazing! You have an incredible brain (intellect) and a powerhouse of information (knowledge)! Keep up the impressive work-- we all bow to you.



My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 90% on knowledge
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 86% on intellect
Link: The Knowledge vs. Intellect Test written by rattytintinface on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test
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What's your epitaph? [Oct. 24th, 2005|10:21 am]
staffordvw
<td align="center">

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com</td>



Here are some alternates that I thought up:

"You're standing on my face."

"Am I a zombie yet?"

"Screw the flowers, leave your wallet."

"Current elevation: -6 ft."

"Peaceful, but itchy."

"At least I spent your inheritance."

"Deposit coin in slot and speak clearly into microphone."

"1979-4392"

"It's hot down here."

"Chocolate tombstone provided by MARS."

"www.goldenpalace.com"

Man, I can't wait! =P
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